BALLERINA BOREALIS





Once upon a time and space
There lived a little girl
Who had a dream that she would dance
And twirl from world to world

I met her on the moon one night
During her eternal flight
I asked if she'd like a lift
She said her feet were lightning swift

Ballerina Borealis dance
Ballerina Borealis dance

Lovely ballerina
Dancing with the light
I followed her from Pluto
To Neptune in one night

I asked her if she'd dance with me
But she said she was meant to be
Alone with no one to
Cling to her tutu

Ballerina Borealis dance
Ballerina Borealis dance

Ballerina Borealis dance
Ballerina Borealis dance



© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

CHARLENE





Charlene was reading her magazine
Because she couldn't sleep
She came across a help wanted
She cut it out to keep
It read "Wanted dancers
Big cash advances
Shy and homely girls need not apply"

Charlene went down to the bar
She said "I want a trial"
She did the tryout wearing
Not much more than a smile
Da boss said "Baby,
You're gonna drive 'em crazy.
I want youse to start tonight"
He liked her style

Charlene, Charlene
She's the prettiest thing you've ever seen
Charlene, Charlene
All of this time where have you been?
Charlene . . .
She'll take your heart away

(Doot'n-doot)
(Doot'n-doot)
(Do-doot Do-doot Doo Doo)

Charlene got up on the stage
Where she appeared for years
She made a fabulous fortune dancing
A lot more than her peers
The guys would holler

(yeah)

And give her a dollar
She'd say "Thank you guys, thank you very very much."

Charlene, Charlene
She's the prettiest thing you've ever seen
Charlene, Charlene
All of this time where have you been?
Charlene . . .
She'll take your heart away

Charlene fell in love with a guy
He said he had a plan
He'd take the money she saved
About thirty grand
He said "Trust me honey,
I'm gonna double your money."
But on the way, he bought a whole bunch of drugs

Now Charlene is living at home again
With a little child
She looks a lot like her
Right down to her smile
When she got older
The little girl told her:
"Mommy, all I want to do is dance."

Charlene, Charlene
She's the prettiest thing you've ever seen
Charlene, Charlene
All of this time where have you been?
Charlene . . .
She'll take your heart away
Charlene!

(Doot'n-doot)
(Doot'n-doot)
(Do-doot Do-doot Doo Doo)




© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

CRIMINAL





I'm a criminal
I've got too much idle time
I'm a criminal
Buying half-priced Valentines
I'm a criminal

I'm a criminal
I used to trap and torture flies
I'm a criminal
I tell my therapist lies
I'm a criminal,
Man, I'm a criminal
And I should be arrested

I'm a criminal
I laugh at Polish jokes
I'm a criminal
Eat my eggs with the yolks
I'm a criminal,
Man I'm a criminal
And I should be arrested

But the greatest crime of all
Was taking my love away from you
You gave me all your heart
I took it and I flew

I did it all for me
Thinking I'd be free
But there's a voice in me
Saying "Guilty! Guilty!"

I'm a criminal
I eat at Burger King
I'm a criminal
'Cause I think that I can sing
I'm a criminal
Man, I'm a criminal
And I should be arrested
I'm a criminal!
I'm a criminal!



© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

DEAD MAN





She's gonna hate me,
She's gonna want to kill me over and over again
She's got a heart that just won't mend

It isn't easy,
Telling the one who loves you that you want to be free
And you know she isn't gonna agree

In her heart and in her head I'm a dead man
In her dreams and in her bed I'm a dead man

In her Imagination,
There's an assassination

She will dispise me,
She's gonna crucify me
I'm gonna burn at the stake
I can feel the coals I'm gonna rake

In her heart and in her head I'm a dead man
In her dreams and in her bed I'm a dead man

In her Imagination,
There's an assassination

It ain't easy being the bad guy
It ain't easy being the one who has to make it end
It ain't easy being the bad guy no no no
The one who has to hurt a friend

In her heart and in her head I'm a dead man
In her dreams and in her bed I'm a dead man

In her Imagination,
There's an assassination

It ain't easy being the bad guy
It ain't easy being the one who has to make it end
It ain't easy being the bad guy no no no
The one who has to hurt a friend,

I didn't want to hurt you
I didn't want to hurt you!


© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

DOUBLE L





Mario's got a tape deck disco
Hot portable New York affordable
Maria's dancing down the aisle
Oooh, she got so much style
And sixty cents buys a token to Hell
If the stars are out, it's hard to tell
At three in the morning on the Double L

And the world is spinning round on a tape machine
And a bottle of wine is passed between
Those who never sleep but always dream
And the emptiness, it seems so full
And there's a certain peace in the push and the pull
As the party grows with lost souls no one knows

Mario's dancing with his dream
Maria feels like a movie queen
Flying high
While the city crawls above
No New York Times to intimidate
And everyone's game who's out that late
And the engineer he never leaves his stall

And the world is spinning round on a tape machine
And a bottle of wine is passed between
Those who never sleep but always dream
And the emptiness, it seems so full
And there's a certain peace in the push and the pull
As the party grows with lost souls no one knows
Oh, no one knows

And the world is spinning round on a tape machine
And a bottle of wine is passed between
Those who never sleep but always dream
And the emptiness, it seems so full
And there's a certain peace in the push and the pull
As the party grows with lost souls no one knows
Oh no one knows



© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

HANDSOME GUYS





Us handsome guys
Everybody thinks that we've got it made
Us handsome guys
Everybody thinks that we're all the same

Laid out, across the beaches
Made out, as such intimidating creatures

Us handsome guys
Everybody thinks that we're all the same
Us handsome guys
They're so afraid to meet us, and it's such a shame

Laid out, across the beaches
Made out, as such intimidating creatures

I wish that I was just an ordinary person
Being handsome makes the situation worsen

Us handsome guys

We walk down the street
We dance to the beat
We feel all the heat of the women who watch us
Handsome guys

I can feel what they're doing to me with their eyes
Oh what can I do?
I can feel what they're doing to me
Don't they know I'm sensitive too?

Those perfect girls
All they want are guys with a lot of brains
Those perfect girls
Think us handsome guys are all the same

They think we're a little too lame
They think we're a little too vain

I wish that I was just an ordinary person
Being handsome makes the situation worsen

Us handsome guys!


© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

I LOVE MYSELF WHEN I'M WITH YOU





I look at you and say I love me
I look at you and say I'm fine
And I like the way I walk
And I like the way I talk
And I love myself when I'm with you

I hold your hand and I'm perfection
I kiss your lips and I'm sublime
And I'm feeling like a king
Who wouldn't change a thing
And I love myself when I'm with you

When I'm alone in the night
I think of you and hold myself real tight
Holding me
Loving me
Knowing how lovely life can be


(You sure can make me feel gigantic)
(You sure can make me feel it all)
(And I'm loving what it's like)
(Hanging round' your psych)
(And I love myself when I'm with you)

When I'm alone in the night
I think of you and hold myself real tight
Holding me
Loving me
Knowing how lovely life can be

I look at you and say I love me

(I lood at you and say I'm fine)

And if life should go my way
Someday you just might say
I love myself when I'm with you
I love myself when I'm with you



© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

I LOVED YOU





There was this crazy goofy dude
Who was in love with someone who'd
Ignore him - what a shame
But he loved her just the same
He loved her

People say he lost his mind
Simply 'cause he couldn't find
A way that he could score
The girl that he adored
He loved her

People say he was quite nice
People say she was not
People say that he gave
And people say that she got

Each night he worked his printing press
Never taking any rest
Printing poems of love
He had plenty of
Because he loved her

People say he was quite nice
People say she was not
People say that he gave
And people say that she got

Somebody found his body 'neath
The pillow where she used to sleep
Embedded in his head
Were letters made of lead
That spelled "I loved you!
I loved you!
I loved you!
I loved you!"



© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

I THINK I'LL KICK YOUR DOG





I met you one night
I was blinded by your light
Your torch was shining bright
And then you burned me

Like a dope I raised my hope
Gave you too much rope
Left myself wide open
And then you hung me

What was I supposed to do?
There must be some way I can get back at you
You wounded me so bad
I really think that I've been had
I think I'll kick your dog
Kick your dog.

I guess I lost my head
Opened up my bed
Gave you all my bread
And then you broke me

Then I found you with some guys
Who must have been my size
They were in my suits and ties
You left me naked

What was I supposed to do?
There must be some way I can get back at you
You wounded me so bad,
I really think that I've been had
I think I'll cook your dog, cook your dog.


What was I supposed to do?
There must be someway I can get back at you
You wounded me so bad,
I really think that I've been had (real bad)
I think I'll kick your dog
I think I'll cook your dog
I think I'll eat your dog



© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

LITTLE MISS FORTUNE





Little Miss Fortune
Why you haven't blown your brains out by now I'll never know

Just south of the border, down Mexico way
Children work for quarters, down Mexico way

Little Miss Fortune
Burdened with a heart of gold
That no one wants to take

She lives with seven little children, in a room with just one bed
In the corner there's a fire, where she turns corn into bread
On the wall there hangs a crucifix, and a kite without a string
And a broken Sony Walkman, that once played the Gypsy Kings

She lives with seven little children, in a room with just one bed
In the corner there's a fire, where she turns corn into bread
On the wall there hangs a crucifix, and a kite without a string
And a broken Sony Walkman, that once played the Gypsy Kings


Little Miss Fortune
Why you haven't blown your brains out by now I never know
I'm glad you didn't though




© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

NAUGHTY ANGELS





Where do naughty angels come from?
I don't have a clue
Do they come from deep dark secrets
Or out of the blue?
All I know is I am happy
Just to be with you
Doing things that naughty angels do

What a lucky devil I am
How was I so blessed
To have your halo on my pillow
Never would have guessed
All I know is I am happy just to be with you
Doing things that naughty angels do

I don't need a fantasy
There are no dreams better than she
I'm loved by my perfectly ideal girl
Nothing compares to my real world

Where do naughty angels go to
When their life is through?
Do they go to Hell or Heaven?
Where do they go to?
I love you and when I'm gone
There's one thing that I know
I want to go where naughty angels go
I want to go where naughty angels go



© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

PISCES





It was Saturday afternoon
And nothing was happening here on the Moon
So I ran right down to the fishing hole
To catch me a fish for tuna casserole
I threw in my line and I felt a gentle pull
I looked in the water and my heart stood still

I'm in love with a fish
Pisces is her name
All my friends think I've got water on the brain
Oh I love her fishy ways
My little bouillabaisse

So we talked about love, and things that rhyme
I told her I had seen Jaws four times
Love's so hard to find
And I'm not just another guy, with a line

But satisfying her could be my death
She likes slow, slow loving
And I keep running out of breath

I'm in love with a fish
Pisces is her name
All my friends think I've got water on the brain
Oh I love her fishy ways
My little bouillabaisse

If evolution could change things sooner
I'd do anything to become a tuna

Trade and sell everything I own
But keep one suit, my herring bone
We could get married, have a wedding with class
Hire a little band
Piano, drums and. . . bass.

I'm in love with a fish
Pisces is her name
All my friends think I've got water on the brain
Oh I love her fishy ways
My little bouillabaisse


© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

SUPERHERO





I had a dream,
You fell off a cliff
And there were jagged rocks below
From a thousand feet up
You were falling fast
And it looked like it was over

Then up in the sky
From out of the blue
Up in the sky
Ccoming to rescue you...

I dreamt you were lost
In a land unknown
You were frightened and so alone
They were coming at you
You didn't know what to do
Guess you thought that you were doomed

Then up in the sky
From out of the blue
Up in the sky
Ccoming to rescue you...

I just, I just, I just want to be
The one you're near, the one you cheer
Your Super Super Super Hero
I just, I just, I just want to be
Your have no fear, I'm right here
Your Super Super Super Hero


I want to take you through the sky
And we could kiss this world goodbye
Goodbye, Goodbye,
Goodbye, Goodbye

Back on the ground
I was working hard
Trying to make this dream come true
Wondering when
Wondering how
You would feel the way I do
'
Cause you are the one
Who I adore
You are the one
I'd do anything for

I just, I just, I just want to be
The one you're near, the one you cheer
Your Super Super Super Hero
I just, I just, I just want to be
Your have no fear, I'm right here
Your Super Super Super Hero...

Me


© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

TOURIST





I can still recall the day we met
And I can still recall the way we met
You looked to me like the Eiffel Tower
Such an awesome sight
Especially at night

You took my heart on a guided tour
Knew I was falling in love for sure
Spent all my money down to my last dime
Then you said, when I get more come and see me sometime

(See me sometime)

You make me feel like a tourist
So far away when you're near
Oh I should have a camera round my neck
And a traveler's check
And a bumper sticker saying I was here

When I got back home I felt so down
You were all I thought of all year round
I saved my money and I worked real hard
What else could I do?

(What else could he do)

Got on the bus I headed straight for you
Then I amazed you with the things I could do
I bought you this and I bought you that
Then you left sight unseen
When my wallet was clean

Mama say my brain is getting hazy
Daddy say a love like this is crazy
Everybody knows
That I'm gonna get zapped
'Cause I'm just a sap
Hooked on a tourist trap

You make me feel like a tourist
So far away when you're near
Oh I should have a camera round my neck
And a traveler's check
And a bumper sticker saying I was here

Mama say my brain is getting hazy
Daddy say a love like this is crazy
Everybody knows
That I'm gonna get zapped
'Cause I'm just a sap
Hooked on a tourist trap

You make me feel like a tourist
So far away when you're near
Oh I should have a camera round my neck
And a traveler's check
And a bumper sticker saying I was here



© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

VEGETARIAN





I took a lot of lives tonight
I opened my mouth and I sentenced them all
And what kills me
It was so easy

It must have made a lot of mothers cry
To watch the executioner make em' fry
And what kills me
It used to be fun

Out, out damn'd spot
I know in Hell I'm gonna rot
Out, out damn'd spot
They wanted to live but I let them not
These hands are red
Bloodstained from the life I led
You ask me why
Does something always have to die?


I took a lot of lives tonight
I opened my mouth and I sentenced them all
And what kills me
It was so damn easy


Out, out damn'd spot
I know in Hell I'm gonna rot
Out, out damn'd spot
They wanted to live but I let them not
These hands are red
Bloodstained from the life I led
You ask me why
Does something always have to die?

Well, I can't change the past
And I can't promise the future
But tonight. . .

I'll just order the salad



© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

WHERE HAVE I BEEN ALL OF MY LIFE?





Watching the kids
In the playground going nuts
So unafraid and so full of guts
I looked at my watch
Realized that I was late
Then I thought of the children
And I thought about my fate

Lately something's missing
That I had when I was small
My world is crumbling
And I'm up against the wall

Where have I been all of my life?
Oh it keeps me wondering
Yeah it keeps me wondering

Went back to the house
And I polished all my shoes
Looked through some photograghs
Of friends I never really knew
I turned on the tube
And I watched this guy in space
And I wondered if
I'd ever, ever get any place

Questions left unanswered
Answers left unquestioned
My life is filled with so many
Petty obsessions

Where have I been all of my life?
Oh it keeps me wondering
Yeah it keeps me wondering

I'm taking my life
And I'm leaving it behind
Except for the dreams
And I'm keeping them this time

Was always standing on my head
Following where I was led
Living the life of the living dead
But no more

Oh where have I been all of my life?
Oh it keeps me wondering
Yeah it keeps me wondering




© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI


 

WHOEVER SAID YOU WERE GONE?





I wake up in the morning
With you on my mind
You spent the night before me
In dreams so divine
And all the day long
I hummed our favorite song

Whoever said you were gone?

Donít know why I allow ya
In all of my dreams
Or why I check each hour
My answer machine
I never did erase
The last call that you placed

Whoever said you were gone?

All my friends say
Itís just an obsession
And Iíll be OK

But you have left my heart
With an impression
That wonít go away

Tonight Iíll be remembering
What I should forget
Storm clouds are ascending
Theyíre filled with regret
When I go to cry
I just fool myself and lie

Whoever said you were gone?

Tonight Iíll rent a movie
And turn off my mind
Iíll fix myself a cocktail
Iíll be just fine
Iíll watch the actors kiss
And get caught up in their bliss

Whoever said you were . . . gone?
Whoever said you were gone?


© George Leonard 1999 and earlier. All Rights Reserved. BMI